Passion - Stefan’s Week-notes 06/10/2024


Inspired by the weeknotes of friends and coachees including John Fitzgerald, Steve Messer and Nour Sidawi - I thought I'd give it a go.


Inspired by the weeknotes of friends and coachees including John Fitzgerald, Steve Messer and Nour Sidawi - I thought I'd give it a go.

Here's a dive in to the happenings of the past week. I start with what I’ve been up to, to frame the week and then the successes.

Why? Because it's easy to look into the dark rather than the light; isn't it?

Hope you enjoy it; comments, observations and thoughts welcome.

What have I been up to?

(Question inspired by @James_ Arthur_Cattell  week notes). It's been a busy week.

  • The big story of this week was that I crashed my bike on Monday, part way through a training ride. I’m ok but my oh my, it’s been a ‘painful’ recovery and I’m hopeful I can ride my bike again from the back end of next week.

  • Cancelled coaching sessions with a Charity CEO, Global CEO, MD in Tech and a Clinical Psychologist - gutted but all wonderfully understanding.

  • End of Week - 1st Coaching Session held with a Head of Service Delivery; impactful and ‘life organising’.

  • Approached by an MD in the Finance sector to run their leadership team strategy; looking forward to exploring the 'doing good’ element of their strategy.

  • Opening my The Little Boat - Art Gallery and making some small sales. I have a sale on as I’ll be handing back the keys to my little boat in January. Don’t worry, the ‘Journey of The Little Boat’ book is still being written; but I’ve decided to refine what I do and focus upon so ‘m not spread so thinly. It also means I won’t have a presence one the same high street as TFCH and my ex wife.

  • Buy some bargains, including greetings cards, via www.thelittleboatiow.co.uk and if you like what you see, make me an offer.

  • I also had a lovely and inspiring visit to The Little Boat from some ‘bright new’ leaders in Finance, Sales, NHS and Transport - Our future could be bright if we listen to them.

  • No cook up this week; pain, rest needed - instead I went for a meal with my mate @Jason_hayles. Just what the doctor ordered and much chat about life .

What's been good about this week?

On the plus front; I survived my bike crash - relatively unscathed. Sure I needed morphine and sure I have been in agony since, but it could have been so much worse. The amount of traffic and tipper trucks which past us as I pulled myself together meant I caught myself thanking ‘whoever’ was looking down upon me for the gap in the traffic I was lucky enough to fall in.

Earlier, in the week, I made the decision to stop taking the morphine so that I could get about, run errands and ferry the kids around if needed. Being able to drive also meant that I got to drive out and meet up with my @Solstice_Sprint Brother Rupert Roo who is a legend on the bike. Not being able to ride with him was a real downer - but we had the chance to chat and laugh and for me to wave him on his way. He is a real spirit lifter. Thanks mate.

On top of all of this my first Thursday post on Rest was well received and I was able to send it across to one of my coaching clients as a reinforcement of a number of the points which had come up in our coaching session.

My Thursday Posts will cover each one of my five life pillars; Work, Rest, Play, Sustenance and Love in turn and I will compile these into my Monthly Be The Waves Newsletter.

I’d love it if you would sign up here:

What am I grateful for?

This week I am grateful for…

The people who stopped to check in on me when I crashed, Dominique for nursing me home and all the lovely people who have messaged to check in on me.

I was all grateful to catch up with my friend and Willoughby’s godmother, the incredibly talented and gifted coach and Uni Lecturer on Leadership, Vanessa Clarke. Recovering herself, from a torn hamstring, she is a wise sage and it’s always wonderful to receive so much value from ‘just’ sharing whats going on in our lives.

I’d also like to repeat my thanks to those who continue to like, share and comment. my Linkedin posts (where I mainly post now).

1. It makes me feel valued and motivates me to do more.

2. It helps me get seen on linked and on instagram by ‘leaning into’ their algorithms.

3. It means that others, outside of my immediate network, get to see my work, know I exist and contact me to find out more about my work, chat about the great thing they are leading, or wish to lead, and just maybe ask me to coach them.

Thank you for helping me to do more of what I love.

This week thank you to @Estherpatrick, @JonBaldwin, @markdarlington , @Andrewsmith , @Staceycrump @alex_bailey, @kerrioneill and @kearbrain

What could have gone better?

I’m not gonna say the crash.

What could have gone better this week is the number of people I have heard from this week who have shared that loved ones have fallen ill.

I’ve been very blessed to have not had to face into losing many people I love or having to nurse people through illness, as I know many people my age have.

I’m becoming more aware that this is both lucky and a bit of ‘ticking bomb’. As I get older, the more likely it is to hit me hard when I do lose someone dear to me.

It is my fathers 79th Birthday this month and he’s not in the best of health after a number of years battling mental health challenges.

I now fear the day I cannot ask him how he is and have him recite his dark day more than I do having to listen to how dark it is.

The donations of free coaching to the leadership team at the amazing leadership team at Mountbatten is partly based upon leaning into this. They do such great work with ‘end of life’ care and in healing people prepare for and deal with bereavement - it felty right to offer to help.

What am I reading?

This week, I continue to read David Attenborough’s “A Life on Our Planet: My Witness Statement and a Vision for the Future” which I continue to recommend everyone reads. A call to action with actionable change; all leaders and teams within my network should read this and actively agree on how they can impact as a team on the climate change we are facing.

In addition tho this; I also read this fab article on “how to lead gen z and maybe even gen alpha

My purpose is to help good people lead great things, and as a coach my role is to help those I work with lead and influence more effectively.

My clients fall into 3 main categories; those starting their leadership journey, those who want to lead, those who have been leading and now want to lead causes.

I like to revisit high level concepts from time to time to see what current thinking is and to make sure that I have what I call ‘whole of picture’ thinking.

This article is a high level reminder and useful resource to share with my clients about what, why and how to approach the generations around them and to consider the rapidly growing workforce of Gen A.

Reading the article, two things struck me.

1 - The 7 headings; which I don’t see as new; in my experience they are what all good leaders, leading great things and good people take into consideration. It’s the stuff I was taught over 20 years ago when I started working for Nationwide building society and is whey I consider them still to be at the forefront of people and culture today.

2 - The paragraph below, in particular, ‘did it’ for me and is part of the reason I have signed up to be a mentor for the fabulous 93 Mentoring which supports a vision to transform what it means to be state-educated in the UK.

“If the average age of your board is over 50 and that of your employees and customers in the 20s or 30s, are you really in touch with the digital wallet driving the future of your business?”

How many of us are listening to ‘them’? I certainly feel the need to do so more and as my children grow and begin to question the world, I believe its important to question this.

The work I did with GDS last year, was particularly exciting for me, as it got me working with a younger demographic again and with a team at the cutting edge of embracing diversity and inclusion, neurodiversity and more human ways of working.

You can read more about our work here:

What am I wishing for?

This week, I am wishing for my back to ease and the pain to subside so that I can:

a) sleep and

b) get out and ride my bike again.

Beyond that I am wishing for more groups; like the SAY NO to CO2 Pipeline across the IOW group on Facebook to effect change through the peaceful, legal and intelligent means the demonstrated.

Whilst the decision was likely to have been made upon a policy and finance basis, I was impressed by how well the group pulled together and lobbied to be heard via the local Labour MP Richard Quigley.

But it was clear that the concerns about …”the destruction it would have caused to our nature, to our tourist industry, it was just so many issues, safety aspects…” could not and should not go unnoticed.

It’s my view that organisations like Greenpeace, Friends of the Earth, The Green Party etc need not only lobby for change but pull together to promote viable alternatives for the behaviours and technologies they wish to be changed. Getting a seat at the table of change is imperative but we need to get much use at explaining and showing the way forward to those ‘who don’t know’ or are ‘scared’ of the ways forward.

It’s Sunday, I dont’ have the kids, this Weekend; so, what am I up to today?

It’s Sunday AM and I have a day without the kids. Today they are with Becky and so it’s a day of jobs and errands as well as helping Dominique get ready for a trip to the mainland.

I’m already missing the kids but it’s nice for them to have some quality day time with their mum.


A Last Word - Passion

The word I would like to leave you with today is "Passion”.

It’s a word which has been ‘placed’ upon the way I work by others for many years and it’s presence and absence is something I feel deeply; in myself and in others.

The dictionary calls passion “ a strong liking or desire for or devotion to some activity, object, or concept”.

If I ask you the question; what are you passionate about? What would be your reply?

Your football team?

Your partner?

Your kids?

The NHS?

All of the above (for example)

I’m passionate and have been passionate about stuff my whole life; if I can’t find a passion for something then it has to go or stop and I’ve become an expert in either finding passion within something or having the bravery to let it go of it, both if it lacks passion and/or no longer serves my other needs.

I am passionate about fairness, justice and freedom and the chance to grow as well as being heard and valued.

I guess this stems from a childhood of feeling the absence of those things and feeling the pleasure experiencing those things brings, as I have grown and been able to lean into circumstances around me.

This week my passion has been challenged in many ways; when I’m passionate about something I can become impatient (whilst still well intended) and I become so driven I can still forgo my own needs.

Thankfully, I am much better at spotting the signs and tempering it - and this is part of my superpower when working with my clients - I know their ‘pain’ acutely and I know the questions I need to be asked to ensure that I stop and contain that passion as often as possible. I bring that to bare in my work.

Passion also connects partly to my decision to ‘let go’ of The Little Boat Shop in January and to create space by making a dent in my ‘life laundry’ over the next two months.

You only have so much passion and energy to support it; if you want to burn bright for a long time - you need to ‘endurance’ it.

Being able to channel that passion into whatever I do, is one of my defining differences, and I hope never to lose it for life, causes and the people around me.

Get in touch if you need to re-find your passion or find a way to channel it more effectively.

I’d love to help you.

Thank you for reading my week notes.

For now, let me leave you with 5 questions:

  1. What’s your passion?

  2. How does it serve you?

  3. How does it hinder you?

  4. What do you need, in order to channel your passion more effectively?

  5. What would be the most useful question to ask yourself next?

Have a great Sunday and Love to you all

I am…

An executive coach who specialises in helping good people lead great things.

Good people care about others, our planet and beauty. Great things are changes for the betterment of society and all that lives within an around it.
It sounds big and fun - it is.

I'm also an endurance racing cyclist and a go. getter.

You can read more about me and what I do; how I work here

#executivecoaching #Leadership #purpose

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